My Cameron Speaks!

This has been on my mind a lot lately and I've been meaning to blog it, but I've had so much on my lately that it's been getting pushed to the side. In Feb of 2006, Cameron had his first day of school at barely 3 years old. His teacher, Mrs. Jenny took him by the hand, lifted it to wave goodbye to me, and walked him into class. I cried my heart out when I got back to my car. You see, this wasn't his first day at a preschool or daycare or Mother's Day Out program. No, he was actually going into an elementary school. Not because he was a super smart 3 year old or a Doogie Houser type. No, he was going because after months of feelings like something was off with my son, I had him tested. I went for months with people telling me I was just jealous that he only said "da da" or that I shouldn't rush him to speak. No, in my heart I knew something was wrong with my son.

I'd always been worried about Cameron. Since the moment I knew he was in my womb, I've loved him. And I vowed to always protect him no matter what. When he was born early at 32 weeks, only 2lbs 12 oz, I knew he might have a difficult life. And, I accepted it. Thankfully, he wasn't born with any illnesses (except jaundice) or anything major. But, apart of me still worried because I just felt something would come along.

So when Cameron had his first birthday and then second birthday without really talking, I became worried. Friends and family told me not to compare him to other children, which I already wasn't doing. Some even teased me saying I was jealous because he wasn't saying "mama". Which was just bullshit. And, actually pretty shitty to say to a mother. But when Cameron finally did start speaking, his words didn't sound like words. I don't know how to really explain it because it's one of those things you have to hear to understand. His words sounded worse than garbled. You just couldn't understand him. I can't even begin to tell you how much it hurt being unable to figure out what was wrong with him when he screamed because I didn't understand him. How angry it made me when strangers gave me looks when they heard him speak. Remind me to tell you the story of the bitch I threw lettuce at in the grocery store for making him cry. I can't even tell you how many times I had to repeat to people "there is NOTHING wrong with my son". I have simply come to learn that people are very insensitive to those who don't fit the mode of normal.

It has been a battle these last five years with Cameron essentially learning how to form words and express himself. Although I've known it for awhile, Cameron has won the battle. But this Friday, we could be making it official at his last IEP/ARD meeting. When Cameron went into the Early Childhood Special Education program in Virginia, he was 3 years old. But his development cognitive skills was of a 22 month old and his speech skills were below normal. At the time, he could only say 4-5 understandable words. Now, he's 8 years old and has an unlimited vocabulary. He is one of the smartest kids in his class and the 2nd best speller in his class. He has truly come a long way.

Now I take Cameron to school everyday. And, instead of having to settle for a wave goodbye initiated by his teacher; I get a very nice and very loud "GOODBYE MOM!!!!"

My Cameron speaks!

Stop Hating on Valentine's Day

Seriously, you simply sound bitter. Calling it a corporate scam holiday makes you sound even more bitter. I really don't get the point of trying to bring everybody else down with you because you're miserable. Why do you want to stop people from feeling loved or appreciated? Spare me the line of "well you should show people how much you love them every day of the year". In theory, we should celebrate everyone's life every day they are alive. Yet, we don't. We only celebrate it one day a year. And, yet no one has a problem that. The same for the 4th of July, Veteran's Day, and Memorial Day. In theory, shouldn't we celebrate our patriotism every day, thank a soldier every day, and remember the soldiers who died in combat every day? Now, yes I do realize there are people who do everyday, especially concerning our soldiers. Yet, no one ever singles out these days. Or any of the other holidays. Except Christmas and Valentine's Day.

Why? Is it because you don't have someone to love and you're jealous of those who do? Because that's how you sound for the most part. Or did you get with a loser of a mate who measures how much you love them with price tags? And now you're broke because of it? Well, sounds like you need a new partner. Are you upset because you didn't get anything at all? Or haven't received anything since elementary school when Valentine's had to be given to everyone in the class? Whatever you're reason(s), why do you think its okay to try to make others feel bad because they enjoy the holiday?

I'm spending Valentine's alone. I'm not whining or hating or complaining. You know what I will do? I will take a little more time out for myself to let Makita know she is appreciated. There is nothing wrong with spending the day by yourself. Perhaps, that's what a lot of people need to do. Take some time out and focus on themselves. I don't love Valentine's Day. But, I definitely don't hate it. It's been here long before me and won't cease to exist because of haters. So stop hating. And acting like you don't take advantage of the 15th and buy 70%+ off candy and chocolate.

Damn This Weather!! I Want to go to School!!!!!

Yeah, see I don't get all excited about snow and rush outside to build snowmen. Or make snow cream (I refuse to make that stuff) or run outside to sled. And all that other jazz. Nope. Not me. The snow to me is simply snow. The stuff that comes out of the sky when the weather is right for it. Yes, I let the boys play in it, etc. But it's just not a big deal to me. This week when they canceled school for the boys, I was okay with it. A lot of my friends, understandably so, we're going bat shit crazy over the school being canceled day after day. I'm guessing that's rare for this area. I, on the other hand, was cool. It didn't really phase me. 1) I was sick and didn't care to be outside getting them to and from school. 2) I didn't want to get out of bed, instead I wanted to sleep in. 3) I wanted them home so that I didn't have to leave the comfort of my bed. LOL

So the boys were home all week. Fine. The icy situation also caused my school to close on Wednesday. Which meant I couldn't go to government class. No big deal. I'm no fan of government. It's a requirement so I deal with it. No problem. But now, they've done it. They've pissed me off. School is canceled until Monday for me. MONDAY!!!!! This means no Saturday class for History. I am absolutely livid!!! Are you kidding me?!?! I want my HISTORY CLASS!!!! It's not fair!! We just started on the US West and how Hollywood messes it all up. And how Chinese immigrants are the reason the "west was won". And how white "settlers" through Manifest Destiny ruined the lives of Native Americans. Yeah, I said it. Don't worry, it's not meant to be mean or to construe racism. I don't have white people or any ethnicity. It's said in truth. Think I'm lying? Look it up. Facts don't lie. We were just getting to the GOOD stuff and now this?!?!

I love school, especially my History class. I'm so bummed.

Stupid weather

Potty Training Boot Camp

So we're out of diapers, completely. And, we're snowed in...sort of. Well, yeah we are. Yesterday, I ventured out to the store because we were already low on diapers. Guess what? I forgot the diapers!!! Imagine how pissed I was when I realized that. On the way home, the brakes on my car finally died. I know, I know, lecture me later. So now we're diaper less and car less. If it was just me, I'd walk to the store and get some because its only about a 1 1/2 miles. No problem for me. I've walked the distance before several times for exercise. But now, there's a problem. Yeah, that white stuff out there called snow. It's totally stranded me. So we're stuck inside. Which means Patrick has gone from stepping up his potty training efforts to fully into potty training boot camp.

That's right. I've gone all Sargent "Don't You Pee on the Floor" on him. Don't worry, I'm not screaming at him or calling him a pansy ass pansy. But I'm all militant on making sure he goes every 30-45 minutes to avoid surprise wet spots on the floor. So far so good, the only place he has accidents is in Cameron's bed. LOL. For some reason, he's all about peeing on his big brother's skater sheets. Fun times.

So until the snow clears and I'm able to get to the store, it's all Thomas the Train undies over here. But really, I'm hoping this works and he just keeps on in the undies. That would be awesome.